- I am totally and desperately in love with the Oxford comma. (That, this, and those. Spot the Oxford comma!)
- I wish there were more opportunities in life to say “because it would hurt a lot, Warren.”
- I’ve a weakness for men on TV/in movies cocking shotguns. I don’t particularly care for firearms in reality, but put a shotgun in Bruce Campbell’s hands, and I melt.
- I am fascinated by the themes of physical and social castration in Gulliver’s Travels.
- There are 2 full body fiberglass mannequins in the “office” area of my house. We call them Edy and Olivia.
- One of my favorite possessions is a fabric shower curtain from the 70s with Frank X. Leyendecker’s “The Flapper” printed on it, which my father stretched on a frame and hung in my room when I was a child. Some kids get teddy bears and rainbows in their nursery, I got a semi-nude woman with butterfly wings.
- I really, really miss working at the Studio Tour. Blowing out queues with hundreds of people in them was like a drug. (My area supervisor once told me that watching me stretch the queue was like watching a ballet. It must have been a very strange ballet he had in mind, because this was during Halloween Horror Nights, and I was yelling like a woman possessed and belittling the guests at the time.)
- Robin Hood is my favorite old school Disney cartoon.
- I think less of people who actively campaigned in support of Prop 8, especially the soccer moms who held up the big ass signs a block away from my son’s elementary school. I can neither confirm nor deny having given the PTA secretary the finger over those damn signs…
- I love BBC America. I want to put David Tennant in my pocket and snog John Barrowman.
- I really wish I could dance.
- When I was a freshman in high school, I stepped on a bright yellow toothpick and broke ¾ of it off in my foot. At the urgent care, it took 4 big male nurses to hold me down so they could take it out. I kicked one of them in the face when they tried to give me local anesthetic. That fucker HURT.
- I never learned how to ride a bike.
- For three years during my childhood, I had a panic attack every time I tried to ride an escalator.
- I hate people who teach or read Shakespeare as pure literature and ignore all the dirty jokes.
- My mother used to cook a turkey (whole bird) every Saturday when I was a kid. She would always burn it. My sister and I loved eating the burnt upper meat, and would pretend we were eating bat wings, like in “The Three Amigos”. I still love the taste of burnt turkey.
- My crazy Mormon relatives have tracked the family genealogy back to Harold Bluetooth (yes, THAT Bluetooth), a Viking king with rotten teeth. Genealogy fascinates me, but I think it is ludicrous to assume that every female through history in one’s family line has faithfully borne her husband’s children, rather than the milkman’s.
- Twinkies make me physically ill.
- I’m afraid that one day, everyone will realize that I’m actually a lot less intelligent than I appear to be.
- I learned how to tell time properly from my alcoholic, man-hating high school French teacher, Madam Cohen.
- When I was in the 8th grade, I was given a Saturday detention for yelling “Fuck You” at a friend. Shockingly, the experience did nothing to check my love of profanity. I still find that when asked to cuss less, I am taken with the perverse desire to swear even more extensively and creatively.
- I once spent an entire weekend helping a friend tape little green army men and toy cars to her bedroom ceiling.
- I wish I could still do plays. I miss it so much.
- I have a kind of phobia of veins. The bulgy arm veins on bodybuilders squick me the fuck out, and I have infrequent dreams in which every vein in my body bursts through my skin.
- I still cry like a baby when I talk about my father.
- I’m considering opening a store on Etsy.com to sell custom paper dolls and decoupage bracelets. Fuck yes, I am lame and crafty like that.
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
25 Random Facts
This meme is quite possibly older than God. You Know the drill; 25 random facts about me: